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Now taking orders — 24hr delivery

I might look slow.
But I'm not.

Tequila is my superpower. I'll build your professional, full-featured website in 24 hours — for only $99. Your competitors paid $3,000 for worse.

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Drop your info. Someone will call you within 10 minutes.
We call within 10 minutes during business hours. No spam. No robots. A real human.
0 Websites Built
0 Avg. Delivery
0 Client Satisfaction
0 Starting Price

Three steps.
One drunk sloth.

You give us the info. We build. You go live. The sloth handles the hard part.

01

Fill Out The Form

Tell us about your business — what you do, your vibe, colors, any ideas. Takes 3 minutes.

02

We Build It

The sloth cracks open the tequila and gets to work. Your professional website comes to life — fast.

03

You Go Live

Review it, request your revisions, and boom — your site is live within 24 hours of starting.

Cheap doesn't mean cheap-looking.

Three plans. All of them will make your competitors uncomfortable.

🦥 The Sloth
$99
One-time · Full website in 24 hours
  • Up to 5 professional pages
  • 100% custom design
  • Mobile responsive
  • Contact form + live chat
  • SEO basics included
  • 1 round of revisions
  • Delivered in 24 hours
Save $1,188
🔒 The Yearly Deal
$2999/yr
One payment · 12 months of Sloth Mode
  • Everything in Sloth Mode
  • Pay once, covered for a year
  • You save $1,188 vs monthly
  • Locked-in rate — no price increases
  • Dedicated account manager
  • Quarterly strategy call
  • First priority on all requests

Websites we've built.

Every business on this list paid $99. Their competitors are still paying $3,000.

labellacucina.com
LA BELLA
Fine Dining · Est. 1987
Authentic
Italian Cuisine
Where every meal becomes a memory
Reserve a Table
La Bella CucinaItalian Restaurant
luxehairstudio.com
Luxe Studio
Hair · Nails · Beauty
Where Beauty
Meets Art
Book your transformation today
Book Now
Luxe Hair StudioHair Salon
quickfixplumbing.com
⚙ QUICKFIX
24/7 Emergency Service
Fast. Reliable.
Affordable.
Licensed & insured — same day service
Call Now
QuickFix PlumbingPlumber
greenscapepro.com
GreenScape
Landscape Design & Care
Your Dream
Outdoor Space
Transforming yards across the city
Free Estimate
GreenScape ProLandscaping
studionoir.design
STUDIO NOIR
Interior Design Studio
Spaces That
Tell Your Story
Luxury interiors, thoughtfully designed
View Portfolio
Studio NoirInterior Designer
modernlivingco.com
MODERN LIVING
Furniture & Home Decor
Crafted for
How You Live
Timeless pieces, modern sensibility
Shop Collection
Modern Living Co.Furniture Store
brightsmiledelta.com
BrightSmile
Family Dentistry
Your Smile
Deserves the Best
Gentle care for the whole family
Book Appointment
BrightSmile DentalDental Office
ironedgefitness.com
IRONEDGE
No Excuses. No Limits.
Train Hard.
Live Strong.
State-of-the-art gym, real results
Get Free Trial
IronEdge FitnessGym & Fitness
harmonlawgroup.com
HARMON LAW
Attorneys at Law · Est. 2003
Protecting
Your Rights
Experienced. Trusted. Results-driven.
Free Consultation
Harmon Law GroupLaw Firm
serenityspa.com
Serenity
Spa & Wellness
Escape.
Restore. Glow.
Full-body treatments & relaxation
Book a Session
Serenity SpaSpa & Wellness

Ready? Let's go.

Fill out the form and we'll get to work. The sloth will have your website ready before you finish your next drink.

What you need: Just your business info, any ideas you have, and your logo if you've got one. We handle everything else.

Payment is collected after you approve the design — not before. Zero risk.

Credit Card PayPal Apple Pay Google Pay
🦥
Drunken Sloth — CW Assistant
Online · replies in <10 min
🦥
✓ Got it! We'll reach out within 10 minutes.
The sloth is already cracking open the tequila. 🍹
TEQUILA CW
The Sloth at Tequila CW

Meet the Sloth.

He owns Tequila CW — the most upscale bar you've ever walked into. He's hanging from the tree in the corner. Dirty t-shirt. Half-asleep. Tequila in hand.

And somehow, he just built 12 websites before you finished your drink.

Looks can be deceiving. This sloth doesn't just build websites — he builds things that make your customers trust you and your competitors nervous.

For $99. In 24 hours. Every single time.

Questions the sloth hears a lot.

100% real. No hidden fees. The $99 plan gets you a full custom website — up to 5 pages, mobile responsive, contact form, live chat, and 1 revision round. The only "catch" is filling out our form.

Once you submit your form, the clock starts. We use your business info to build your site. Within 24 hours you'll get a preview link. You get one round of changes, then it's live.

Just fill out the form — your business name, what you do, any colors or ideas, and your logo if you have one. We handle everything else. Zero technical knowledge needed.

You pay after you see and approve the design. We accept credit card, PayPal, Apple Pay, and Google Pay. You never pay before seeing what we built.

That's what revisions are for. The $99 plan includes 1 round of changes. Higher plans include more. Tell us what you want different and we fix it.

Yes. Once your site is live, you can upgrade or add features. We're not going anywhere — the sloth will be here, hanging from his tree, tequila in hand.